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20121201
20121231
Search Results 0 to 15 of about 16 (some duplicates have been removed)
) nation, i love new york city. the big apple, the city that never sleeps, rat xanadu. so i was crushed to learn the metropolis i know and love has changed, not one person was murdered in new york city on monday. nypd deputy commissioner paul brown couldn't even remember the last time a day went by where not one person was shot, stabbed or slashed. (laughter) >> stephen: what happened? i remember the real new york of the '80s, when in a single night you could score some weed, catch a times square porno and then get stabbed in the neck by a coked-up lou reed. and that was a pretty good first datement now times square has become a disney bubba gump wimp company. the worst that could happen is one of those giant m & ms tries to flash you its peanut. where is the thrilling dangerous city of midnight cowboy or taxi driver? >> you talking to me? >> stephen: i wish i was talking to you. (laughter) instead of i'm talking to her. supercalifragislisticexpiali -- supercalifragislisticexpiali [bleep] me. folk, i've had it, had it. this disturbing lack of violence is not just a problem for our city
archaeologists had to travel 200 meters from a temple in the capital city pyongyang and then look down to see a rectangular rock carved with the words "unicorn lair." (laughter) it makes sense it's labeled, how else would the mailman know where to deliver the rainbows? (laughter) folks, listen to me here this has dangerous geopolitical ramifications because it gives historical legitimacy to the regime of kim jong-un by linking him to an ancient ruler who according to korea's history books road a unicorn and, as a key qlan, he road it gangnam style. (cheers and applause) one second, i just want to write down the last time i am legally allowed to reference gangnam style. (laughter) get that off to the library of congress. thank you very much. here's the danger, folks this will attract impressionable american girls to communism. look at this traditional rendering of a north korean unicorn. what little girl wouldn't love to cuddle up with a catfish faced reptilian horse beast? (laughter) don't do it, girls! because we've got better mythical creatures right here in america like big foot! or a mode
Search Results 0 to 15 of about 16 (some duplicates have been removed)

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